The Inner Child And Erikson’s 8 Stages Of Development

I thought it would be insightful to delve into Erik Erikson’s psychosocial stages of development and provide a summary of each stage. Understanding these stages offers us a valuable lens through which we can identify and reflect on any challenges we might have faced in our own development. By recognizing how these stages have shaped our inner child, we can begin to heal and nurture those early wounds with compassion and acceptance. This process not only helps us address past issues but also empowers us to break free from victimhood, leading to a more balanced and authentic sense of self.

Here are the 8 stages and how they affect us:

1. Trust vs. Mistrust (birth to 18 months): We learn to trust or mistrust our caregivers and the world. This affects our security and hope.

2. Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt (18 months to 3 years): We learn to be independent or dependent on others. This affects our confidence and will.

3. Initiative vs. Guilt (3 to 5 years): We learn to be creative or conformist. This affects our motivation and purpose.

4. Industry vs. Inferiority (6 to 11 years): We learn to be productive or unproductive. This affects our competence and self-esteem.

5. Identity vs. Role Confusion (12 to 18 years): We learn to be ourselves or someone else. This affects our identity and fidelity.

6. Intimacy vs. Isolation (18 to 40 years): We learn to be intimate or isolated. This affects our relationships and love.

7. Generativity vs. Stagnation (40 to 65 years): We learn to be generative or stagnant. This affects our contribution and care.

8. Integrity vs. Despair (65+ years): We learn to be accepting or regretful. This affects our wisdom and integrity.

Some of these stages may have been unresolved for us, leading us to adopt victimised thoughts as a way of coping with them. For example, if you experienced mistrust as an infant, you may fear abandonment as an adult. If you experienced shame as a toddler, you may have low self-esteem as an adult. If you experienced guilt as a preschooler, you may have a perfectionist attitude as an adult. And so on.

What steps can you take to resolve these unresolved conflicts within yourself? How can you break free from the limitations of victimhood and embark on a journey toward discovering a more balanced, authentic, and empowered sense of self?

Here are some tips:

• Identify which stage(s) may have been problematic for you. In our weekly sessions, we practice mindfulness-based techniques like the inner child work to get in touch with the experiences that may have impacted us. 

• Through mindfulness-based techniques, you can become aware of these thoughts, feelings and behaviours and start healing your inner child.